Friends

I've never been one to make many friends. I've made a lot of acquaintances. I've kept people at a distance and when I've tried the next step things always fell apart. Its not that I don't want them closer but that I don't think they want to be closer. I keep conversations casual, not too deep.

I lost what I thought were friends when I became a christian. They thought I had a "Holier than thou" attitude because I stopped doing drugs, and things that I did before. And since then I have been slow to allow anyone in. But God has changed that in me. I have brothers and sisters in Christ that I now consider family...closer than a brother, closer than a friend.

It was tough for me. I judged a lot. And had taken on the "Holier than thou" that I didn't want. I judged to a point that God had me confess it to the whole church. I loved my friends and my heart ached at what I was doing to them in secret. I criticized instead of lifting up in prayer. Thankfully they forgave me. I enjoy the time we spend together and look forward to it every week. The fun and fellowship. But I must admit to longing for more. I've felt recently that its stayed too much on the surface. God is working in all of our lives, but other than "blogging" we rarely speak about what God is doing. His love for us is amazing. Galatians 6:2 says that we should "Bear one another's burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ". I also want to share in their joys.

I've recently started meeting with one of my friends weekly. Its another part of my week I look forward to. I pray God blesses our time together. Whatever He may have in store I'm ready for.

Now it was a bit awkward to post this considering all my friends will read it, but I really wanted to share my heart. He is beautiful in all the ways he reveals Himself, through nature, our children, friends, etc. To see His image, His creation.